I get asked advice all the time from my clients (especially first-time parents) during their newborn session at my studio in Santa Clarita. I figured it would be a fun topic to talk about some of the things I wish I had known when I was a new mom.

1. Everything on your registry…Yea….your not going need most of that. 

I had so much STUFF y’all….just so much stuff. And would you believe me if I told you I wasn’t sure if it was enough? HAHA Here’s a list of things I ACTUALLY USED.

• my boobs (I only breastfed, my daughter wouldn’t take a bottle or a pacifier  AT ALL so that keeping her alive thing…that was all on me. That’s a story for another time)
• diapers
• a few onesies
• my boba wrap
• car seat

Yall this is it….when my daughter was a newborn and for months after… this was IT!!!  We spent thousands and thousands of dollars preparing for her and we needed NOTHING.

Now you are probably thinking to yourself how is that even possible?! You are a horrible mother. Well I definitely don’t think I am a horrible mother, but I do have an explanation for you on why we ended up only really needing FIVE ITEMS.

• My daughter WOULD NOT take a bottle. I used a pump for a few weeks thinking she would eventually take a bottle and I would have a freezer stash, but NOPE…so eventually the pump got tossed (you legally have to do this) and my freezer stash got donated (I still have a couple of bags hoping one day that my husband will surprise me and make me one of those beautiful breastfeeding pieces of jewelry (but I won’t hold my breath hahaha). That explains my boobs. Gotta keep my little one’s tummy full!
• Diapers….I’m thinking this one is self-explanatory
• Onesies…it was was the middle of summer in the desert when I had Sarine. It was 110 outside and hot. Honestly, she spent most of her time diapers.
• My Boba wrap. This thing was my LIFE SAVER. I had two of them, while one was in the washer after being spit-up on, I could go grab my clean one. LOL My daughter hated being put down, she didn’t like the 4MOMs swing thing, she didn’t like her pack in play… She wanted to be with mamma and you know, I’m ok with that. = )
• Car Seat – even though we don’t go many places for like first 6 months of her life, this one is an obvious need.

What about her crib you ask??? We ended up co-sleeping because that is what ended up working best for our family.

Mammas, you don’t need much, you just need what is going to work for your family. You might use more than we did, and that’s awesome. But with the time of year and my parenting practices…we really didn’t need much. And Im actually kind of grateful for that!

2. You are gonna lose friends, but don’t worry you will make new ones! 

After you bring this precious little into the world your life completely changes. I know that is hard to grasp. I didn’t even grasp it myself. My husband had a daughter from a previous marriage and he kept telling me your life will never be the same…I blew him off over and over but MAN WAS HE RIGHT. After Sarine was born I found myself and babywearing meeting, and moms groups meet up and the local birth center. Nothing to my previous days of brunches and long hikes with my girlfriends.  I’m still friends with past girlfriends on Facebook but we arn’t close how we used to be before my daughter arrived. I have a set of friends now that have children close in age to my daughter and we get together on the regular for the kids to play and for us moms to have a chnace to talk. We even just recetly started having moms night outs without the kids because they are around 4 now and can stay at home with dad or grandma for a few hours. And that has been great! Your circle of friends will change that is totally ok.

3. GET NEWBORN PHOTOS TAKEN 

You guys…. I know I am kind of biased because I AM a newborn photographer. But hear me out here. I DIDN”T have newborn portraits taken of my daughter and along with not having a wedding it is the biggest regret of my entire life. I grew her, I carried her, I gave birth to her and I don’t have a single nice picture of me with her or her by herself when she was a newborn. Ugh!!! It just kills me. Do I have cell phone pictures? Yes of course. But I have NOTHING I can put in a frame to hang in her room or the hallway to show her how precious she was to me in that moment of time. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE treat this milestone with the all of the love, gratitude and respect it deserves..because come a month later you don’t have a newborn anymore and that moment is gone forever. One of the biggest reasons I do newborn protraiture is becasue I want to give people this experience i never had. THIS IS ALL I HAVE!! UGH!!!!! 😩

4. Let your husband or partner care for the baby too. They are good parents too. 

I am a huge control freak and I’ll be honest I didn’t let my husband do a lot of stuff. I admit there were times I was reluctant to hand over the reins for fear he’d do something wrong, or not the way I’d have done it. And eventually, he stopped trying and then that caused a problem….so where is the solution for dads here? Mammas, your husband is just as capable as you of taking care of your children. Men are more capable at soothing, bouncing, feeding, bathing, diaper changing, reading bedtime stories, and kissing boo-boos and than some women give them credit for. And if not? Guess what he will learn. Guy’s got to learn some time. LET THEM PARENT TOO, learn from my mistake. LOL

5. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE A LIFE

This one I still have a hard time grasping. My daughter is 4 1/2 and I have never been anyway from her for an entire night. Im hoping to have a night away once she is around 5.  My husband didn’t have our first date night until after she was 2. I even have grandma and grandpa only 20 minutes away and never used that blessing. I was too scared of leaving her. What if something happened! If you can’t tell already I have major anxiety especially when it comes to my child. But here’s the thing. You’re allowed to have a life outside of your child..It’s actually a healthy thing! A night out with the girls, a day alone shopping, mornings at the gym, or a weekend away on your anniversary is essential to your well-being, your relationship, and even your child’s development. Remember: you are a mom 24/7, but that doesn’t mean you have to be “Mommy” 24/7. Wish I would have learned this ALOT sooner in my mom journey. LOL

That is just a few things I can think of off the top of my head. If you are about to have a baby or just had one and have questions feel free to send me an email and ask! If you are on the fence about scheduling newborn portraits, go back and read #3 again and try to picture yoursefl 5 years from now not having of these moments documented…. THEN send me an email to book you session mamma. Because these milestones are just way too important!

xo – Corina